Thread title feels like the setup to a new Terminator movie. We have to send Kyle Reese back in time to stop the class of 2020 from enrolling before it is too late! An unemployed pharmacist himself, Kyle is pursued through time by his unrelenting student loan debt. It can't be bargained with. It can't be reasoned with. It doesn't feel pity, or remorse, or fear. And it absolutely will not stop, ever, until you are dead.
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That description of the terminator actually matches student loan debt perfectly.